Wednesday, January 04, 2006

Epiphany

I've been wondering for some time now why my transition to HK has been difficult and why it's been so hard to be away from my family when I should be used to it. Since college, I've always lived a good distance away from them and never have I missed them as much as I do now. The reason finally hit me today as I met my friend Cindy and we discussed some of the trials we are going through.

I realized that MN was easier on me because we had a solid church family. There were ladies that played the role of aunt, grandma, sister and even mom. I had uncles, grandpas, brothers, and dads. I even had nieces and nephews. We were included in family events... birthday parties, Thanksgiving meals and 4th of July BBQ's. Although I missed my immediate family, I had extended ones that helped fill that void. It's different here in HK. I'm sure a lot of that is because we've only been here 5 months but I also suspect it also has to do with the culture and we may never have that same kind of family. That's okay and I need to come to grip with that reality but it makes being away from our family harder. I am thankful that God showed me this today because now I can begin to take charge of those feelings and move on.

As Cindy and I talked, she brought up a great question. She asked me, "What do you think will happen when you go home in Feb? Will you desire to move back to the states or will you miss HK and consider it home?" I didn't have an answer for her but as I thought about it I do have a hunch that I will look forward to returning home to HK. Yes, I will miss my family and friends. Yes, I will miss the conveniences of the states. But I know this is where God has called us and what a great opportunity it is.

On the ferry ride home, I thought about why I have a hard time dealing with Isabella not being around her grandparents/aunts/uncles/cousins and as I began to list the negatives.. I stopped and considered the positives and got excited. Isabella will be bi-lingual, she will understand a variety of cultures, be able to see the world, and not have to fear (for the most part) random acts of violence. What's more important to me than her spending time with family is that she learns to love and follow God. So to return home at this point in time would be disobeying God and that's not the example I want to set.

PTL that God speaks to us and shows us areas in our lives that need growth.

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