Insanity

I feel like I'm going insane. I've been offered one job... have a second interview for another job... and have a 3rd interview in which we are working out the details of where to meet. This is what I wanted right?... or so I thought. But when I got the email in which I was offered the job, my heart sank... like I wanted to get the job... just didn't want to actually take it.

I dunno... I feel like I'm going crazy. I'd like something... but I want it to be on my terms. Simply because I don't need the job and I don't want it to take me away from my family. Am I being selfish? Does God want me to do this? Some would say that maybe He would as He's opened all these doors but could He just be giving me the option since this is something I was interested in? It's times like these where I wish God would audibly speak to me and tell me what to do. Because I want to do His will but with the feelings I have in regards to 2 of these positions... it just doesn't seem right.

And then this brings up another whole set of questions.... aiya